Do you ever wake feeling anxious and not sure why you feel that way? There may be a vague idea of why, then your mind goes back to the worries of the previous day, even though you have dealt with the concerns and are at peace with them. Are there deeper issues? Could the anxiety be connected to feelings of unhappiness that crop up from time to time? The fear that you will never find what lights you up? Some fear left over from childhood or adolescence? We are much alike if you can relate to these feelings.
Why would we enjoy life and yet have such feelings? Having feelings of unworthiness, foolishness, fear, guilt, and shame? Oh yes, we have come a long way, but these are deeply engrained. We do not sweat the small stuff as we used too, but the daily construct of living in this world takes a lot of energy. The feelings of not fitting in, like the square peg in the round hole analogy. Living in the world and maneuvering through the the chaos of politics, economics, and survival does not mean we cannot have joy. Wanting more than just passing off the world as it is to our children, it takes more than just enjoying life, there is a need to put our energy into the world to receive the joy from the world.
Most days I feel so small in a big world so how can I bring change. I do not have much influence how can I change the economic or political system, how our food is grown or affect the climate crisis. I believe that change comes by being my authentic self and putting my energy into the world and not hide it. This is how change comes to our world and we can all do this!
There are a few things that light me up. Firstly, I enjoy travelling with my wife. We have gone many places together and it never gets old, because we work well together, and the world is an amazing tapestry of culture and landscapes. Secondly genealogy research. I enjoy researching my family history and resolving some mysteries. It is through this work I felt a connection to my great grandmother, which in turn led me toward discovering the powerful feminine part within myself. Thirdly all things rocks. This is a return to my childhood love of discovering fossils and polishing rocks. I have returned to this today and started making stone pendants wrapped in copper wire. I love creating, along with the rockhounding discoveries, and skill development in the process of working with the stones. These are all connections, to the world around me, my ancestral heritage and to the earth.
I have never considered myself to be artsy or an artist of any kind, but I have always had the desire to create. I never felt any good at it and gave up, although the desire never left me. Now I am creating and putting myself and my work out there for others to see and buy. What I have inside me with all my quirks, is unique to me and the world needs what I have to give, this is only the beginning of what I can offer and it is the same for you. What you have is unique to you and the world needs your gifts, your genuine self! It will help you grow as it does for me, and it will help you gain more courage in all areas of your life. There may be many out there already doing what you want to do, but do not let that stop you. Know that you are one of a kind, because no one can do it quite like you! You are You-nique